THE LURE(s):
Suspended license for driving ladies crazy / a variation on “can I buy you a drink”
I packed some classic bait into my tackle box before I headed off to cast out my line last night: “I heard they suspended your license for driving all the ladies here crazy” line. Here is how I planned to throw it out there:
Suspended license for driving ladies crazy / a variation on “can I buy you a drink”
I packed some classic bait into my tackle box before I headed off to cast out my line last night: “I heard they suspended your license for driving all the ladies here crazy” line. Here is how I planned to throw it out there:
(Sidle up close to desired target)
ME: Did you drive here?
Guy: (OPTION 1… if he says): Yes
ME: Damn, that’s pretty daring of you, I heard they suspended your license for driving all the ladies crazy!
OPTION 2: if he says NO
ME: That’s what I figured; I heard they’d suspended your license for driving all the ladies here crazy!
Because this is kind of a wordy pick up, I did a couple dry runs with my friends before heading out last night. I botched both of my dry runs, but figured if I messed up on the real thing I’d just play it off as endearing.
When we arrived to Old Pro around 11:30, we had to pay a cover charge. Fortunately the cover comes with a drink ticket for 2 drinks- which must be redeemed at once. (They start charging a $10.00 cover around 8:45 on Friday and Saturday nights.) This unique cover charge system lent itself well to an easier, location specific pick-up: “Hey, I’ve got a coupon for two drinks, so what shall I get for you?”
THE CAST:
Spotting one that measures up
After doing a couple laps around old pro, no one stood out to me as a good catch. I wanted to use my drink coupon line though, so I held onto my coupon, sipped a soda and chatted with my friends. To bide time while I waiting to acquire a suitable target I watched a couple of old pro’s patrons live out their rodeo fantasies atop the Mechanical Bull in the back corner of the bar. It seemed like the guy at the controls to the bull was going pretty easy on the riders, but the two guys that I saw saddle up to that mechanized beast were pretty rigid and did not last more than a few seconds before they unceremoniously shot off. (Which, I’m sure is, not the reputation they were hoping to establish when they’d decided to mount that steed).
There was not a steady flow of activity at the bull riding area, so my friends and I crossed over to the opposite side of the bar and claimed a spot at one of the dozen or so long tall bar tables that lined one wall of old pro. I kept an eye on the door to see if any interesting prospects showed up, but by 12:30 when I still hadn't seen anyone promising, and with my free drink ticket burning a hole in my pocket, I turned to one of my guy friends and laid it on him: “Do you need another drink? -I've still got my drink ticket from the cover fee.” I asked nonchalantly.
He said he would indeed take me up on the offer, so we chatted a bit as we walked over to cash in my drink coupon and, gentleman that he is, he even took care of the annoying task of flagging down a bartender and ordering the drinks for us, so even though I had no romantic designs on my friend, I’m still going to call that a successful catch with my line. I feel like the drink coupon bit really does provide a good way to break the ice and get some one on one time with a person.
I still wanted to use my driver’s license pick up though, so after I finished my beer, I did another lap of the bar and FINALLY, I saw someone worthy of my super-cheesy-over-rehearsed-license-line. When I saw my intended guy, I decided to hang back and run through my lines again in my head to be sure I landed the pick up… before I could finish my mental dress rehearsal though, the guy’s friend walked over and started chatting me up. Drat!
The cute guy’s friend was reasonably attractive and seemed nice enough though, so I figured I would still try to work the line in just to see how well it went over, but this guy who’d approached me was firing questions at me like his life depended on it. I barely had a chance to finish answering his last question before he’d shot a new inquiry my way, so working in a complicated pick up line seemed like it was not going to be easy. Plus, by the third time he asked me “Do you come here often.” To which I replied “still no,” I really didn’t even want to use the line anymore… I just wanted to stop answering this guy's same handful of questions over and over and get away, so when he finally paused for a minute, I took the opportunity to excuse myself, explaining that I had to get back to my friends that I’d come with.
We left the bar shortly after I rejoined my group… but before heading home, one of my friends wanted to satiate her ravenous hunger for pizza, so we walked a couple blocks down University Ave. and joined the throngs of other folks who’d just been turned out of the various bars in the area at 2:00 AM and were now in line for a slice at Pizza My Heart. I have never waited so eagerly or so long to get pizza as I did last night. The line stretched well out the door of the restaurant into the adjacent plaza.
One thing I will say is that, though it was cold waiting in the line (until we got to the part of the line that was actually inside the building), it was a pretty interesting experience. First of all, there were waaayy more hot guys at Pizza My Heart than there had been at Old Pro, so aesthetically that was nice. Second of all, the homeless guy wearing a bedazzled Tony the Tiger Tshirt under his Orange Velvet Sweat suite was amusing at least for a little while as he sung (poorly) along to the old school 80s songs he was blasting from his boom box.
Also, because pretty much everyone in line was drunk, they were all very friendly, so it passed some time when the guy in front of me, who was apparently a newbie to Palo Alto, started chatting me up, asking about what people did for fun in Silicon Valley and then when his attention waned and he moved onto talking to the person on the other side of him in line, I got some good banter going with another guy about the fight that must have occurred to result in the catastrophically mangled pile of lettuce and accouterments at the bottom of the salad display case in Pizza My Heart and of course by the time my friends and I finally did get our pizza, I know for me at least, it was the most satisfying dining experience I’ve had in recent memory… That warm foldable slice with it’s tangy sauce and salty cheese was absolute perfection especially after the beer I’d had earlier. So, thought it wasn’t necessarily what I’d been looking for at the start of my outing, I definitely got some pleasant oral stimulation at the end of the night.
THE SPOT(s)
OLD PRO:
PROS: Fun things to do: mechanical bull, photo booth, Shotskis/ yard of beer pitchers
-Lots of seating: indoor long bar tables, + small alcove with a sofa etc inside.
& outdoor seating around fire pits.
-They have a late-night menu.
CONS: (The night that I was there at least) Not an attractive dating pool.
No Dance Floor/ DJ
PIZZA MY HEART:
PROS: -Pizza is delicious!
-They are open late.
-They sell by the slice ($3.25 - 4.50/ slice depending on toppings)
CONS:Due to the fact that many people seem to know about the deliciousness of the pizza coupled with the fact that not many places are open, if you show up here at 2:00 AM, you will be waiting a good long while for your pizza.
-Line to order moves very slow.
ME: Did you drive here?
Guy: (OPTION 1… if he says): Yes
ME: Damn, that’s pretty daring of you, I heard they suspended your license for driving all the ladies crazy!
OPTION 2: if he says NO
ME: That’s what I figured; I heard they’d suspended your license for driving all the ladies here crazy!
Because this is kind of a wordy pick up, I did a couple dry runs with my friends before heading out last night. I botched both of my dry runs, but figured if I messed up on the real thing I’d just play it off as endearing.
When we arrived to Old Pro around 11:30, we had to pay a cover charge. Fortunately the cover comes with a drink ticket for 2 drinks- which must be redeemed at once. (They start charging a $10.00 cover around 8:45 on Friday and Saturday nights.) This unique cover charge system lent itself well to an easier, location specific pick-up: “Hey, I’ve got a coupon for two drinks, so what shall I get for you?”
THE CAST:
Spotting one that measures up
After doing a couple laps around old pro, no one stood out to me as a good catch. I wanted to use my drink coupon line though, so I held onto my coupon, sipped a soda and chatted with my friends. To bide time while I waiting to acquire a suitable target I watched a couple of old pro’s patrons live out their rodeo fantasies atop the Mechanical Bull in the back corner of the bar. It seemed like the guy at the controls to the bull was going pretty easy on the riders, but the two guys that I saw saddle up to that mechanized beast were pretty rigid and did not last more than a few seconds before they unceremoniously shot off. (Which, I’m sure is, not the reputation they were hoping to establish when they’d decided to mount that steed).
There was not a steady flow of activity at the bull riding area, so my friends and I crossed over to the opposite side of the bar and claimed a spot at one of the dozen or so long tall bar tables that lined one wall of old pro. I kept an eye on the door to see if any interesting prospects showed up, but by 12:30 when I still hadn't seen anyone promising, and with my free drink ticket burning a hole in my pocket, I turned to one of my guy friends and laid it on him: “Do you need another drink? -I've still got my drink ticket from the cover fee.” I asked nonchalantly.
He said he would indeed take me up on the offer, so we chatted a bit as we walked over to cash in my drink coupon and, gentleman that he is, he even took care of the annoying task of flagging down a bartender and ordering the drinks for us, so even though I had no romantic designs on my friend, I’m still going to call that a successful catch with my line. I feel like the drink coupon bit really does provide a good way to break the ice and get some one on one time with a person.
I still wanted to use my driver’s license pick up though, so after I finished my beer, I did another lap of the bar and FINALLY, I saw someone worthy of my super-cheesy-over-rehearsed-license-line. When I saw my intended guy, I decided to hang back and run through my lines again in my head to be sure I landed the pick up… before I could finish my mental dress rehearsal though, the guy’s friend walked over and started chatting me up. Drat!
The cute guy’s friend was reasonably attractive and seemed nice enough though, so I figured I would still try to work the line in just to see how well it went over, but this guy who’d approached me was firing questions at me like his life depended on it. I barely had a chance to finish answering his last question before he’d shot a new inquiry my way, so working in a complicated pick up line seemed like it was not going to be easy. Plus, by the third time he asked me “Do you come here often.” To which I replied “still no,” I really didn’t even want to use the line anymore… I just wanted to stop answering this guy's same handful of questions over and over and get away, so when he finally paused for a minute, I took the opportunity to excuse myself, explaining that I had to get back to my friends that I’d come with.
We left the bar shortly after I rejoined my group… but before heading home, one of my friends wanted to satiate her ravenous hunger for pizza, so we walked a couple blocks down University Ave. and joined the throngs of other folks who’d just been turned out of the various bars in the area at 2:00 AM and were now in line for a slice at Pizza My Heart. I have never waited so eagerly or so long to get pizza as I did last night. The line stretched well out the door of the restaurant into the adjacent plaza.
One thing I will say is that, though it was cold waiting in the line (until we got to the part of the line that was actually inside the building), it was a pretty interesting experience. First of all, there were waaayy more hot guys at Pizza My Heart than there had been at Old Pro, so aesthetically that was nice. Second of all, the homeless guy wearing a bedazzled Tony the Tiger Tshirt under his Orange Velvet Sweat suite was amusing at least for a little while as he sung (poorly) along to the old school 80s songs he was blasting from his boom box.
Also, because pretty much everyone in line was drunk, they were all very friendly, so it passed some time when the guy in front of me, who was apparently a newbie to Palo Alto, started chatting me up, asking about what people did for fun in Silicon Valley and then when his attention waned and he moved onto talking to the person on the other side of him in line, I got some good banter going with another guy about the fight that must have occurred to result in the catastrophically mangled pile of lettuce and accouterments at the bottom of the salad display case in Pizza My Heart and of course by the time my friends and I finally did get our pizza, I know for me at least, it was the most satisfying dining experience I’ve had in recent memory… That warm foldable slice with it’s tangy sauce and salty cheese was absolute perfection especially after the beer I’d had earlier. So, thought it wasn’t necessarily what I’d been looking for at the start of my outing, I definitely got some pleasant oral stimulation at the end of the night.
THE SPOT(s)
OLD PRO:
PROS: Fun things to do: mechanical bull, photo booth, Shotskis/ yard of beer pitchers
-Lots of seating: indoor long bar tables, + small alcove with a sofa etc inside.
& outdoor seating around fire pits.
-They have a late-night menu.
CONS: (The night that I was there at least) Not an attractive dating pool.
No Dance Floor/ DJ
PIZZA MY HEART:
PROS: -Pizza is delicious!
-They are open late.
-They sell by the slice ($3.25 - 4.50/ slice depending on toppings)
CONS:Due to the fact that many people seem to know about the deliciousness of the pizza coupled with the fact that not many places are open, if you show up here at 2:00 AM, you will be waiting a good long while for your pizza.
-Line to order moves very slow.
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